Paris Hilton
Paris
Warners


Paris Hilton...ultimately proving that money cannot buy talent. She also verifies that anyone can hire the best production team, provided you have the cash, as Scott Storch and Tom Whalley fabricate an album that, with all its cheesiness, sounds half-decent.

Oh, don't get me wrong, Hilton is predictably a terrible singer, mostly she is either purring sexually through the lyrics like a Marilyn Monroe impersonator or her voice is so technologically enhanced that it is hardly recognisable.

But if you want to look at this album in a positive light, some of the songs themselves are not all that bad - Screwed has a bobby rock-pop chorus and I Want You samples the catchy 'Grease' theme. But it wouldn't be the modest Paris Hilton we all know and despise if she wasn't singing lines like, "All the boys, all the silly boys are fighting over me/Maybe 'cause I'm hot to death and so, so, so sexy," in Fightin', or "Tonight I'll be your liquid dream...All the girls and boys are looking at me/'cause they know that I'm sexy," in Turn You On...And so on and so forth until we reach her take of the classic Do You Think I'm Sexy which, unsurprisingly, she absolutely massacres.

But wait, there's more! Just in case you didn't get enough smutty Paris Hilton fun out of the album, there is a DVD too! 30 gloriously cringe-worthy minutes where you see the ditsy heiress in action making her album.

Paris Hilton is quoted as saying she cries every time she listens to this album, it is so good. Honey, don't give up your day job...Hang on, what is her actual day job?

Sherree Woodmore